Meg (illicit_ire) wrote in verbosities,
Meg
illicit_ire
verbosities

Just Fun

From an e-mail. They make me laugh... Some are funny, some are dumb, and some take a second to understand. Enjoy...


1.) A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.

2.) What's the defination of a will? (It's a dead giveaway).

3.) Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

4.) A backward poet writes inverse.

5.) In democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your count that votes.

6.) A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

7.) If you don't pay your exorcist you get reposessed.

8.) With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

9.) Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

10.) When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

11.) The man who fell inot an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

12.) A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

13.) You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

14.) Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.

15.) He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

16.) Every calendar's days are numbered.

17.) A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and 'taint mine.

18.) A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

19.) He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

20.) A plateau is a high form of flattery.

21.) The short fourtuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

22.) Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

23.) When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

24.) Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

25.) When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

26.) Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
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